Jack

You’re not a kind person” Alice said staring me in the eyes for a long time.

“You mean me, or him?”

Jack was sitting next to me and was smiling at the waitress ignoring what Alice was saying.

“I mean you, him what’s the difference it’s all you.”

Jack was rolling up his sleeves and using the skin on his arms to itch his face which made a sandpaper sound because of the two day beard. “See that’s confusing because that’s Jack” I pointed at Jack, who kept looking at the waitress and scratching. “I’m me.” I put my pointer finger to my own chest. Alice held her eyes on me and didn’t move her mouth or blink. 

“We aren’t the same person, he’s disgusting, look at him…” 

Jack had stood up now and was doing the same thing he was doing while sitting, except standing. The waitress finally noticed and came over to us. “Your friend needs to fucking relax or you need to leave he’s freaking me out.” Jack was standing awkwardly close to the waitress now.

“He’s fucking disgusting” Alice said, looking at me still ignoring Jack.

The waitress was looking at me now, too. “Oh I get it. fuck this guy” the waitress said looking directly at me.  Jack was now pretending to fuck the waitress from behind and mouthing words I couldn’t make out. “What a piece of shit” the waitress said.

“Oh, I know” said Alice.

I looked out the window of the diner. Across the street someone had written “HEAVY” in yellow paint on a billboard advertising a Netflix show called “Mine”. The actress looked like Taylor Swift and was holding a small pink flower to her mouth, the background was blood red. The yellow paint made me think of mustard.  I still loved Katy, but there wasn’t much I could do about that now. I thought about her every day the second my eyes opened in the morning. She wouldn’t understand this, but every drag of a cigarette was somehow for her.

“Can I get the check?” I asked the waitress who was still staring at me.

I looked at Alice. “I’ll get this.” 

“Thanks.” She said without blinking. 

The waitress changed her stance up and handed me the tiny computer with the tap thing, and I held my phone over it until it beeped.  I clicked 15% for the tip.

“I thought maybe if I brought, him…” I pointed at Jack who was still hip thrusting the waitress from behind without touching her. “I guess I thought if I brought him and you saw us together, you’d remember that we aren’t the same person”.

Alice stood up from the table, looked me directly in the eyes. And walked away without saying anything. The waitress turned and walked back behind the counter to cut a piece of key lime pie from the dessert cart. 

“Jesus fucking Christ let’s go, man.” I said loudly to Jack as I stood up to leave too. 

Jack was trying to pick something off the ground which looked like hardened ketchup circle. He was scratching it with his finger nails.  A horse fly buzzed up against the glass of the window, it was too loud. I suddenly noticed the room had gone completely silent, I could only hear the fly. Buzzing and banging his stupid fly brain against the window. 

Jack and I went outside. 

“You want a cigarette?” Jack asked me calmly.

“Sure” I said.

He handed me one, he looked handsome when girls weren’t around. Calm. Almost normal. 

“Why is it like this?”

“Like what?” asked Jack

“Nobody can tell the difference between us. Everything you do is seen as me. Nobody seems to understand”. Jack leaned against the railing of the steps outside the diner. He took a drag, coughed one time and then spoke.

“Look man you may be right but here’s the thing. You’re selfish, you’re an asshole. You’re not a bad guy, but you don’t always think about peoples feelings. You move fast and break everything. And you broke Katy’s heart, I just did what you asked me to do.”

Jack was right, and I wished I was dead.